Today is a blue day. We all have them. Maybe it is the weather or your tired, the kids are driving you nuts, something sets it off and you are blue. It takes alot for me to become non-blue. My dearest friend Alesha passed away last Friday. She was one of my first friends as a mommy. We use to even joke how much alike our daughters looked like when they were babies.  So this blog is dedicated to her and to our friendship.

The first time I met her was at a scrap-booking event. She LOVED to scrapbook and was extraordinarily good at it. She could blend colors and textures like no one else I ever knew. I was in aw of her for the start, I was never daring like her. Anyway, there was no kids there as that was kinda the unwritten rule. She was flipping through my book on Bella and I was looking through hers on Kaleigh. She stopped about half way through and got huffy. She accused me of taking a picture of Kaleigh and she demanded to know how I got her. LOL It was my daughter in a dress that Kaleigh had also. =) She was sitting on a couch or something mundane and Alesha totally thought that I had stolen Kaleigh for this one picture. =)

Another great one is when we moved into my Grandma's home. We were having a scrap booking party one night and we always like to have a drink or two. Well we made Margaritas.  Two blenders later we finally had some =) So it was our running joke that Alesha is the blender-ate-or. No blender can with stand her blending skills. =) I think 4 total had succumbed to her drink making skills. =) 

She was always the life of the party. Her and I would stay up until 2 or 3am scrapbooking and drinking. Andrew would come down in the middle of the night and say enough is enough. Alesha would say "ok Big Papa" And he was say "Ok Big Mama' It was their joke. He was one of the friends that Andrew can say was his friend too. He misses her. There is no one else who has ever called him a nickname. 

Scrap booking just isn't the same without her around to do it with. Gracie's album is a little skinny =) 

I went into the hospital during her 9 month stay. Also when they let her out after the first round of chemo and she was able to be home for a few days we went over and took her some DQ. =) I always told her once she beat this and got home we would order in some Outback Steaks, drink a few margaritas and relax. We never got to do that.

Alesha was and will always be a huge part of my life. As my son Alex said today at the dinner table. Bella had said she got to see Alesha's body and didn't understand why God didn't want her body too. How can she be up in heaven with God if her body was here. Alex then says in a quiet voice with his head down "When God makes you an angel you don't need your body anymore. God just wants your spirit. That is what makes you an angel" Out of his mouth and to Alesha's ears. She is truly an angel looking down from above. Probably with a sarcastic remark on her lips. =) 

Here is Clifford's CL ad

I am so sad and all alone. Al I really want is a nice warm bed to lay on and maybe a kid to throw a ball or two for me. I might not fetch it all the time or bring it back but to have someone who really cares about me. That is what I want. You see I am in a boarding kennel. And they let me out to run with other dogs, I had to boxer friends who were SO much fun to run with but they have been picked up to go back to their families. So I am alone again. See, I was living the good life. I had a family and kids and even a cat to chase! Then the people started to yell and argue ALL the time. They would slam doors and stomp their feet. It was so scary I tried to comfort mom but she just kept sobbing saying "what are we going to do now?" I tried to be the best I could be I ate less food, and didn't make any messes. I tried to make myself smaller more invisible to Dad. But poor Mom. One night she told me that I had to be strong that someone would find me in time. Then they walked out the door and I never saw them again. I cried at the window for hours but they never came back. I was her shoulder to cry on in her time of need I just knew they would come back. So I waited. I tried to hold my potty needs as long as I could but eventually I had to let them go. I was SO embarrassed I knew Dad would be SO mad I messed up the carpet. After a few days I got off the couch... They weren't coming back. I tried to reach the food they had left out for me and I could only reach into the very top of the bag. I was so hungry and scared and all alone. It was cold in the house and the cat was left in a box and he was crying and meowing. Without a litter box he got nasty he started to smell. He was giving up on life I could tell. I tried to keep his spirits up saying that it wouldn't be long until Mom and Dad came back laughing it was all a sad mistake. I told him I would chase him again and that he better be ready for me. Finally he stopped Meowing too. He gave up just laid down ready to pass. I thought i saw a head in the window the next day. I gave a soft pitiful wolf I was so weak I couldn't stand up anymore. I used the last of my strength to try and get this ladies attention. I heard the lock slide back and a lady gasped. She yelled and screamed something about how could they and injustice. I tired to thump my tail on the floor so she knew not to be afraid. She walked over to me pet my head and told me I would be ok. She dialed someone on her phone and BAM I was photo graphed and whisked away. I was taken to this lady who saves pets like me. Those who are forgotten and left behind. She made sure I went tot he doctor. I had to have explorative surgery on my intestines I was so weak and starved. I came through ok and was placed in a foster home. I loved it. This lady let me stay in my own room on my own bed and rest. I had never had this kind of treatment before and it made me sad a little. I wondered what had happened to Mom. Once I got strong enough to stand on my own I was allowed to go outside and play in the yard with her other dogs. It was so much fun I wold chase them barking and tackle them to the ground. Unfortunately they didn't like me playing rough and we fought. I still say I was just defending myself. =) Those little ankle bitters were going to eat me! I put my tail between my legs and coward when she put me back into my room. It was starting to look more like a cell. She gave me 2 more chances and then said that she couldn't put her dogs at risk. understand that but I was just playing with them. No one ever taught me how to play nice. So here I am. I am at a nice boarding kennel until I can find my family. I still think about my Mom and Dad. I wonder where they are. I wonder if Mom is still crying and if she has a shoulder to cry on. I miss them, but I know now that they aren't coming back for me. So now I wait, hoping one day someone with a big friend or kids (those would be so nice) will come and pick me. Pick me to take home see pass my skinny exterior and know that the hound in me is going to be a loyal best friend for many many years to come. Can that be you?

Please Read Duke's Ad on CL

Ok, I wrote it but it is all about him. He really needs a good home.

So here I sit. Don't get me wrong I love my foster home but I miss my momma. Some may call me a sissy but I do. See she fell and hurt herself. She was taken away and I haven't seen her since. Her kids came into town to "see to her recovery" and they all sat at the table and cried. They knew that my Momma couldn't take care of me anymore and it broke their heart. They both wanted to fly me out to where they lived but couldn't manage it. After many tears both their and mine they had decided to find help in getting me a perfect new home. I had to put on my brave face. I knew my Momma would want me to be brave for her. I went to the doctor and got all my shots. He moved my legs and pulled my ears. After awhile he gave me a thumbs up. I had all my shots my rabies and I am good to go for many more years. The Daughter's were crying on the phone telling someone what a good dog I am. how I love everyone, kids of all ages and even all size dogs. How I love to cuddle by your feet and I will rest my head on your lap to be pet. They even said how I am afraid of steps! How embarrassing. The next day they were crying again and I knew. The nice lady pulled up in her van and got out. She talked to the Daughter's and they both cried. They grabbed me around my neck and said goodbye. While we drove off even the new lady had tears in her eyes. She told me not to worry but I looked out the back window watching my house as if faded away. I won't see it again. I never even got to say goodbye to Momma. When we got to the new place she took me outside and trimmed the knots out of my hair (Momma's hands had gotten bad and couldn't hold the brush well anymore) She have be a big hug around my neck and said "here we go" I walked in and saw her kids. They called me Beethoven I tried to wag my tail but it just wasn't in me. i wasn't feeling happy. I paced and paced around the house. The little girl (she was only up to my shoulder) she gave me a hug and stroked my side. I finally calmed down and laid by the front door. The puppy came and laid his head on my tail. He tried to tell me that the new lady was good and everything would be ok now. I just sighed and quietly wept inside. 
That was a week ago now. I am getting happier. I go on walks with the other dogs and the kids and that is ok. I am eating and am not so sad now. I know Momma would want me to be happy. She would only do what is best for me. So here I am awaiting me new home. I am a great guy. I can't make puppies (thank goodness a guy my age having kids! No Way!) I have just gone to the doctor and gotten stuck so I won't get sick. Oh and Man can I WOOF to let you know I gotta go out. I like to think of myself as the Barry Manalow of the St. Bernards. =) So please if you think you can love and Ol' St like me please email and get more information. Thank you so much, 
Duke

My kids in Puppy Heaven

So we are now fostering these 5 tiny little puppies. They are seriously the cutes things ever alive. We have Dora, Scooter, Skeeter, Watermelon, and Foxy. They are So funny since each puppy has it's own personality. We had to get different colors collars so that Andrew can tell them apart. Alex's favorite is Scooter. he is the only guy we have right now and loves to play all the time.  Bella like Skeeter who chases your feet while you walk and tried to play tug-o-war with your pant legs. Gracie likes Dora (who is my favorite too) she is SO small, loves to give kisses, and is in the picture her head on my pant leg. Jordan loves them all. =) He likes everyone as long as he gets to play with them he is happy. Andrew likes Foxy ( pictured sleeping on the red blanket the one on the bottom.) She is becoming hilarious. She will play with the tags on Petey's collar. =) She also is the most playful of the girls dogs. =)

We are housebreaking them well paper training. A few are getting it. Scooter and Skeeter will go outside too if you take them out.  We haven't fostered puppies in a long time! The kids and I are having  a ball and even Andrew is getting to like them. =) I will defiantly be putting more pictures up as we get more. =)

It is the most wonderful time of the year!

Okay! So it is Christmas time! I will get pictures up as soon as I can. We had a great 3 days of Christmas! Seriously. We had the holiday that never ends.

First we opened our presents. The kids had a BLAST and cleaned house with Bakugon toys! I think count so far Jordan 20 Alex 10. LOL It is unfair advantage Jordan just had his birthday too. Bella and Gracie got their doll house which is HUGE! It is taller then them and has every room filled with furniture. Bella got her hair braider thing that she has been asking for and Gracie well she is only 2. She got a book and the doll house furniture was all given to her so that Bella would have to share with her. The boys got a bunch of new books. Oh and new big boy bed room sets. sport themed. 

Then Nana and Pappy came over with Uncle Rob and Leann. They got clothes from them a TON of bakugon and I can't even remember what else! 

Then off to Grandma and Papa's. where they got DS games which they didn't put down the entire time they were there. Uncle Danny got them a bakugon carrying case which they filled up. Gracie got a whole doggie playset. A stroller carrying case doggie bed and little stuff that goes with it. Bella got a littlest pets play house. =) A good clean sweep. =) Oh and more books and puzzles. 

I got a new laptop!!! My ow Mac. Which will come in So much use since I am a foster coordinator LOL and am online all the time. The old desktop is running So slow so we got a laptop for Andrew and i thought it is my gift so it is really mine. LOL. And then  the basement one has no internet anymore so the kiddies can play all their games and stuff on it. I got Andrew a pair of slippers LOL hey he asked for them this year, last year, and the year before last. So he finally got them. He also got a gift card for an hour massage =) Which he really needs. Poor guy. He works so hard and it is starting to take it's toll on his body. He needs one. I can't give him one for an hour. =)

So now we are off for round 3 of Christmas. =) Like I said I will put pictures up later. Happy Holidays!

Bob: my first Foster dog

Bouncy Bob: He was my first foster along with his sister Delilah. I had him for only about a week before he was adopted. He was hilarious! I would take him, Dee, and Twink to the dog park and he would chase everyone and then come and attack his sister. He is so full of life. Just go go go! A great dog and super easy to potty train too! My boys still talk about him. =) He had a 6th toe on one of his feet too. Kinda crazy looking. =)




Delilah: Oh what a sweet little girl. She hardly ever barked at all! She was a snuggler bug. The girls loved her to death. They would "walk" her throughout the house. She was more laid back. The first night here just just came right in and sat by the boys and I swear she watched the rest of the movie with them. =) She finally got her forever home 2 weeks after I had gotten her. She lives with a runner now which is perfect since she has lots of energy and greyhound in her blood




Mickey Mick! He is my 3rd foster dog. He is still up for adoption actually. He was in a fire that claimed the life of his life partner. =( He didn't eat for along time and now he is basically a skeleton with fur. However he is fattening up and loving life. HE is SUPER clingy.=) He loves to follow you everywhere you go. He also LOVES kids, Mick slept with my boys in their beds while he was here. He is great little dog. Never tried to run away (probably because it is snowing outside) He loves his coat and loves being pampered all day. He is great too because he is housebroken! Yeah no messes for me. He is with another foster family now being TOTALLY babied by their 13 year old daughter. =)




Nina: Oh what can I say about her. She had a rough life so far. She was found on the side of the road with another older puppy. He leg was broken. They took her to the pound where due to financial reasons she was going to be put to sleep. Luckily ARC stepped in and I am fostering her. He leg is in fact broken in 2 places up by her hip bone. So she doesn't sure her leg to walk at all and barely puts it on the ground. If that wasn't enough she was pregnant. So she couldn't have anything done really to fix the leg. She gave birth on Saturday to a still born puppy. It was the hardest thing I think I have dealt with in a long time. She just kept licking him trying to revive him. we named him Blitzen and buried him at my childhood home next to my golden retriever under the "dogwood" tree. Rest in Peace little guy.... And though that was hard (understatement of th world) God must be looking out for Nina since she doesn't have a puppy to nurse she can get her leg fixed and find her forever home. Though it is going to have to be a Uber Special family. She is VERY close to my heart. =)

Those are my little lost souls who I have helped become what they were meant to be. Beloved family pets. The more I foster the more pictures and stories i will post. If you have ever though about fostering please do. There are SO many loving and deserving dogs/puppies at shelter just waiting to be rescued by a loving safe home. And dont forget to check out www.arc-ohio.org we have lots of sweet loving loyal dogs ready for their forever and always homes. =)

Oh my goodness!

So I just now realized it has been almost a month since I last posted! So much has happened here. I have started fostering doggies with a WONDERFUL rescue called The Animal Rescue Center. www.arc-ohio.org =) Had to put that in there. =)

Lets see We went to a birthday party this weekend which was SO much fun! It was at an indoor inflatable place and the kids had a blast! Gracie wouldn't get out of the big jumper thing. =) The boys got to see their friend who they haven't seen in over a month. It was fun. Silly me forgot to put our names on the gifts we got. LOL

Sunday we met up with Jordan's biological mom. We all went bowling. It was actually kinda fun. I was a little nervous about it. He hasn't seen her in a LONG time. But they had a blast. He got birthday/Christmas presents form her and he loves playing with them. It was nice. Hey as long as she is a positive person in his life that is good with me. =) A kid can never have too much love. And it went well so we will be doing it again.

Alex's bio dad has decided to email us back finally. We offered him to see Alex also and he had the nerve to demand our phone and address then say he can only come on months when Alex is in school. HELLO we aren't taking him out of school or disrupting his life when he has school work to concentrate on. Ugh. I mean no offense but we have Alex we know him and his scheduel. Don't make demands when you aren't in charge.

The girls are crazy as usual. Gracie is hitting the terrible 2's in full force. She is constantly telling us to go away or she will say "I'm angry" and then she will run away. :) SO hard not to laugh when she does this stuff. She is much more vocal then Bella was. She knows what she wants and when she wants it. Lord help us when she is a teen. Bella and I are working on letter recognition in preparation for kindergarten next year! I can't believe she is going to kindergarten already. I am so not ready.

Andrew and I are doing great actually. Fostering dogs has really helped keep the peace. LOL Seriously, I have wanted to go back to school but as of right now we just can't afford it. So I wanted to work which again isn't possible right now. SO I found an ad on craig's list asking for a foster for 2 shepherd pups. And BAM! LOVE IT! I am actively helping find foster homes for the dogs that they rescue. I am heling to find people to adopt the dogs we have and I love it! i really feel like I am making a difference in the world. =) One dog life at a time. So anyway me having purpouse (besides being wife and mom) has really made me a much more well rounded happier person. Thus making life better for all in my house. =) That and thanks to an awesome friend Andrew now has a pool table and a passion of his own...dirt bike riding. Thanks Mike. =P But it makes him happy and gives him some "man" time. Hey it works for us. Everyone should foster and ride dirt bikes. =)

Happy Second Birthday Gracie Goose!

More pictures of us =)

Here is my beautiful Boo Bunny. She is the princess Bella for Halloween. =)

Here is my knight in shining armor! Alex the great!

The littlest princess Gracie (and the green dragon Twink in the background)


Jordan the Brave
















Here are our pictures from Halloween. We had such a blast! I made each of the kids costumes this year! We had a theme. =) The girls were the princesses and the boys the Knights. Twink our dog was the green dragon. =) We went all around the nieghborhood and got SO much candy. Thanks to my mom and dad who came by to hand out the candy. =)

The littlest Princess ever. I made Gracie's costume in about
a night and got SO many comments on how sweet she was. At
Great Grandma's nursing home she was the Bella of the Ball. =)
All the residents loved her and when we went through the haunted
part she just said "Hi Spooky man" to each guy who jumped out.
LOL My brave little thing. =)











Alex, Jordan, Emily, Katie, Gracie, and Bella.
All dressed up for trick or treating at Great
Grandma's nursing home. Bella loves her older
cousins so much. She held their hand the whole
time we were there. She wasn't scared
either of the scary men. =)












Here are the sweetest little guys ever!
The Knights protecting their little princesses.
=) Alex loved the haunted house part.
He likes to get scared.
Jordan though hung back with Auntie Jen,
Gracie, and I. LOL. And he screamed like a little girl.
=) My sweet little guy. =)

Happy Halloween!
Here are the girls along with their friends at our Halloween Play date party. All the kids loved to play pin the nose ont he jack-o-lantern. We also guessed how many candy corns in the pail. =) So much fun!

GO Magic!!!! Alex's last soccer game was a sad victory. The team finally played like a team
with passing and follow through and really working together. Alex rocked defense! He blocked the ball
from getting any where near his teams goal. He "super kicked" the ball out to his team mates and
really played the best game yet. Afterwards they got a ribbon and a treat. Oh and the pile on the coach.
=) He says he want so to play indoor too. I think he found his sport. =)

Our day at the Children's Museum. When you first walk into the museum yo don't think it is that great. It is small and kinda crowded. But then you let the kids go and MAN it rocks! We stayed for over 3 hours. They have a nursery rhyme area for counting and colors and stuff. And a water area which Gracie LOVED! They get to wear tiny little rain coats and stuff. SO cute! And then they had a nieghborhood area. A two story house with medical center attached were the girls favorites. They also had a grocery store and a bank a bus and so much more. The girls had a blast!

As a final fun day we went to Memphis Kiddie Park with a friend of ours. It was a beautiful day and for the most part the kiddies were good. =) Bella nd Gracie had a blast! We even went on the roller coaster. Bella got over her fear from last year but Gracie freaked out! Then once the ride was over though she didn't want to get off. Silly girls.

De-Stressing

Though many may not know I too have stressed out times. Many people view me as super mom taking care of my 4 kids while my husband is away for the week. All the time without usually letting on that I am stressed or over whelmed. Well, I do get that way.
Especially when like now my favorite monthly friend rears it's ugly head. So like most chocolate is in my diet and stress. Today especially. It was going well I volunteer at my boys school in the library room and Gracie comes too while Bella is in school. She was running around all crazy playing Hide in Seek. Which is she runs and "hides" by closing her eyes while you try not to laugh while your looking all over for the invisible Grace Ann. LOL We came home and stress started piling on.
By the time the boys came home I was ready to cry. So we went to the valley and walked. My favorite de-stresser. BUT even that couldn't be peaceful since everyone and their mom called, texted, IM'd, or emailed me on my cell. UGH! By the time we were home (2 hours later) I lost all my hair... okay that is an exaggeration but you know what I mean. I decided right then I was shutting off my phones. All of them. The house the cell and the computer. DANG if my stres didn't just dissappear!
The kids took a bath while I rinsed off (cold shower later that nmight it was hot today) the boys a shower. Then they got out got in PJ's and cleaned up the house while I made dinner. DANG It was SO peaceful and nice. We did spelling words while the girls listened to a boook on tape in their room. Then Alex read to Jordan and Twink (the dog) slept on the floor.
SO moral of the story. Technology while it is great sometimes. Needs to be turned off to de-stress. I had the BEST time with my kids once those Dang things were off. Such peace and happiness. A night I am sure the kids will remember as a great one!
And we will be doing it again tomorrow! =)

This is a GO Me day!

Ok. This is so silly. BUT Monday we had friends over and Bella nd her little buddy turned off the pilot light on the watre heater. Ugh. So that night didn't notice anything. i always take my showers in the morning and the kids all take showers so we had enough hot water stored up. So Tuesday morning came around and I was just thinking it was taking a long time to heat up (it usually does) well I ran out of time so I just washe dmy face and brushed my teeth and went about my business. Then last night I did the dishes and so thought that was why I had no hot water. Well this morning still no hot water. UGH! So i went downstairs and sure enough the water heater was turned off. SO after much mental berating of myself I gave up. Called Andrew crying b/c if I can't do this the world will end LOL. So I TAKE a FREEZING cold shower and all looks better through my eyes. Guess I just needed to "chill OUt" LOL. I go back downstairs and BAM got the stinker lit! Ta-Da. So today is a go me day! Not to mention I almost have Bella's halloween costume made. Then Gracie's and the boys are super easy! =) So Oh yeah Go ME!

Soccer

So I am a week late and haven't downloaded pictures yet but here are the boys games in detail.

Alex: This year they are learning positions. 3 in back, 3 in front and goalie. Each kid gets to play each position. Which is good I guess unless it is a close game and you kid is in the goal. Ugh! Poor Alex he was in the goal and they scored on them. It was then their lead by like 2 goals. So not his fault if they lost just made him sad that he couldn't stop the ball. Then to make matters worse someone kicked the ball up in the air to clear it out of the mess they were all huddled in. And of course Alex gets kicked with the ball int he face! He goes down. Poor kid. Had a ugly light bruise for the next few days. BUT he sat out one round (inning, quarter whatever it is called)and then went back in! That is my team player! Poor kid. his team wound up loosing like 4 to 2. Oh well. He plays with 3rd graders and 2nd graders however I think it is only him and one other 2nd grader with all 3rd graders on his team. Guess that will make him better later on. =)

Jordan: Oh the woe! We have had a hard time with him this year. At first he was practicing ont he wrong team. On a team with 2nd and 3rd graders. Then we found the right team and together they won the game. This past Saturday though they got beat BAD! The other team only had 4 players and one sibling of one of the players who was in kindergarten. So like 4 1/2 players totaly. Compared to their 7 players. UGH Jordan didn't go to the ball but basically just stood their and waited for them to give himt he ball, which of course didn't happen. So needless to say they lost like 20 to 0. Not even kidding. His team stunk. He had another practice yesterday and Andrew went with him to see how his coach was coahing since this year Andrew couldn't coach them and hey I am wondermom but I have NO idea about soccer and it's rules. SO he went came back and was like no wonder they lost so bad. The coach is just having them run around. Not like passing or dribbling or anything just running around. I thought maybe she was teachingf them not to crowd aorund the ball but to pass to each other. but he said no. Just running around. =)

So we will see how they do this week. I will try and post pics of this weeks games soon.

Why are panties so hard. =P

Okay, So I have been potty teaching Gracie. Lets just say she is teaching me some new things. I worked hard with both my boys and they were about 3 before they even kinda got it and more towards 3 1/2 before they were perfect on potty time, wiping, and all that jazz.
Bella was SUPER easy! She basically just took Jordan into the bathroom with her for one whole day and she was done. He was her little cheer leader making a huge deal out of pee and poo on the potty. SO that was it one day and I played a minimal role just potty flusher.

Now it is Gracie's turn. Thanks to a friend ours her daughter came over and showed Gracie how it was done. Then with the help of another little boy and a firend of our we went to the zoo with he helped get us in the groove of potty time. The whole trying every 5 mintues in every bathroom the zoo had. Multiple times. =) But thank God they were their so that I didn;t feel like Gracie was holding them back. =)

So now we got it down... almost. We can't do panties or pants.

She can life the dress or skirt to make sure no mess gets on it but she can't figure to pull the panties down before making potty. So she sits panties on on the potty and goes. Then is SO proud that she did it not knowing that she still made a huge mess for mommy to clean up. Sow hy are panties so hard? She can pull them down and pull them up. She just doesn't associate that with going ont he potty. My husband says not to worry she will get it and until them just let her be nakie from the waist down. I guess he can be right. I remember though a girl in my school who never wore panties. not even when she had a skirt or dress on. Yuck.

I am totally disheartened

Today is a blue day.
The girls were up at 6:30am and usually go right back to sleep however today Bella was up and ready to start her new day. Which in itself isn't bad. Then I made breakfast went over spelling words with Alex since his test is today and they were off to school. I went back into the kitchen to see my dog Twink eating the breakfast casserole right off the oven. It is gone. She has a big appetite.
Then our social worker called us. I am so saddened. That is an understatement. For those who don't know. I have adopted my son Jordan and he is now offically mine. This has brought our family closer and Jordan and I now have something no one can take away no matter how hard they try. I love him like he grew in my own body from my own soul. And in a way he acts more like me then any of my other kids. =) His Bio Mom had to make the single most difficult desicion of her life. To let her son go. Yes it was to us who have loved him and taken care of him for his whole life but still. That is THE hardest thing she will ever had to do. And I commend her for that. For thinking of Jordan and not herself. For doing what is BEST for Jordan.
Andrew is now adopting Alex. I went to college and got a baby no degree. LOL. Alex's father has been flaky at most. He never wanted me to have the baby and offered to pay for my abortion. Though I am pro choice for me there is no choice. I Had to have him. I loved him the minute I found out I was pregnant. I "knew" I was pregnant from the moment of conception. He is my little man. My heart and soul and my little "brown berry" I had Alex here in Ohio with no contact from his bio dad until he was around 3 months and no support until the courts in Medina made him pay around 6 years later. He hasn't been in Alex's life and had moved clear across the country. And of course now that Andrew, the ONLY dad Alex has ever known wants to adopt Alex. To make things official. To give him his name. NOW Bio Dad decides to fight. So we are going to court. Paying for lawyers, and court reporters, for social workers, and everything else all because a selfish 30 something year old man is only thinking of himself and not what is BEST for Alex.
I am so discusted at this point with the way Bio man has carried himself. He is a selfish person. I am not saying that signing your rights away to your child is not hard. Like I said before it is probably the hardest thing a parent has to do. But if you know your child is going to a better family. To someone who loves him and has a postive relationship and can be there for him all the time and you know you can't be living clear ACROSS the frickin COUNRTY! And you haven't in the past. I mean really wouldn't you realize that the best thing is to say good bye. Knowing that we would if you wanted send you up dates like pictures and such. Hello I keep a blog. =) You can see him and know about him all the time. As much as I write. And I try to write alot. It just makes me SO mad and angry, and sad. I am just not having a good day. I need a hug. =)